How to Avoid Spontaneous Combustion
1: Not everyone feels the same way you do about things — we're all different — so don't assume that everyone will have the same priorities as you.
2: If you're bursting for a wee walk in backward to the bathroom. Open your trousers before you even look at the toilet to avoid your bladder getting excited and wetting yourself.
3: Ask yourself questions before making a negative comment: What's the point in saying this? Is there a positive suggestion to rectify the situation accompanying this statement? What is there to gain by saying this?
4: There is no point in fighting on the internet. Keep away from comment sections.
5: Compartmentalise every element of your life so that the whole thing doesn't explode if one part goes on fire.
6: Don't waste your time hating people. Complete waste of energy.
7: Looking back at past events can be helpful to avoid repetition. However, if you look back too much, you won't go anywhere else.
8: If you get a sweaty bum when sitting on a glossy surface, before standing, wipe your bum along the surface to remove the sweat shape of your arse.
9: Belly buttons are useful for storing shower gel when in the bath.
